Sunday, December 19, 2004


I just wanna stop in here and wish you all a very happy holiday season!!! Sorry I don't post much here. Life is kinda crazy. Lots goin on with the kids at school!! My daughter was one of the stars of her schools Christmas play. She did such a wonderful job, I was in tears a couple of times....LOL!!!

Then, there's my screwed up family. I was supposed to go to a party at my mom's house today. It was a surprise birthday party for her and my step dad. I had every intention of going, my sister called about 9 this morning, and I told her then, that I would be there. But the more I thought about it, the more upset I got. Everyone was going to be there, and I knew that there would be "family" pictures taken, and it just started to depress me that not ALL of my family would be there. Since hubby is not allowed to be up there, he wouldn't be a part of it all or in the pictures, and that's just WRONG!!! I know that my "F"ing step father wouldn't be this way if it were one of his kids, but for some reason, it's ok since it's not. I just don't feel like I can be a part of this family anymore. When my mom was here on Thursday, I told her that after the holiday's are over, we need to get my step dad and hubby together, so that they can talk and get this over with. My mom simply told me "It won't do any good, your step dad will never forgive your hubby. OH FOR GOD'S SAKE.......that S.O.B. needs to "F"ing GROW UP!!!! And my mom needs to realize that her decision to allow this to go on is going to end up in her basically losing a child and her grandchildren. I just can't go up there and "pay face", it's wrong, and it's lying!!!!

Yesterday (December 18th) was a difficult day!! It was the 25th anniversary of the day my dad died. I tried so hard to not let it get to me, but, in the end, it did :( I hope my daddy knows how much I love him and miss him!!!

Anyway, I've ranted enough....LOL!!! I hope that you all have a WONDERFUL Christmas!!!

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